Happy Birthday to Me.

My ONE YEAR sobriety is in 5 mins!

One year.

One year without drugs or alcohol.

I'm the chameleon. I've transformed myself once again and somehow managed to come back through the other side.

A year ago I was recovering from alcohol poisoning...again.

I was waking up in some strange hospital...again.

I was told I'd been on the ground passed out in front of a bar I didn't know I'd gone into. I remember I was just going to a movie with a "friend" that night.

Then the next thing I know, I'm waking up the next morning at some hospital where I was admitted with a blood alcohol level of a near lethal level. Some movie I saw, eh?

Literally the weekend before that? I also had alcohol poisoning, was raped...woke up in bed with a guy from fucking AA of all places...he was completely sober. I had about four liters of wine pumping through me. Spent three days perpetually blacked out and finally came to in the woods behind my parents house with no shoes on binging and purging.

A month before that? I was in the ICU on life support. Suicide attempt. Massive overdose.

I'm 23. I've been to the darker side of life and back.

I'm now exploring this confounded thing called the light. love. stability. laughter. life.

So far, it's exhilarating on this side. A bit lonely...but I choose this over the waking death I walked in for years.